Kern's Holler Contrarian Opinion

We Must Make Mad Science More Efficient

Author:  Doktor Zapanaz, Overlord of the Quod Dimension, Mad Scientist 

Abstract:  As Mad Scientists, many of us have been pursuing similar
goals for many years. Transferring human minds into the bodies of wild animals or insects, tearing open rifts in the very fabric of space-time itself in order to allow hordes of hideous other-dimensional demons to flood into this universe and destroy all life on earth, reanimating dead tissue to create an unholy mockery of life, and delving into secrets that Man was never meant to tamper with. And yet we have failed to work together to make our methodology more efficient and cost-effective.  We are hopelessly behind the times. Herein I hope to share my most efficient methodologies for the benefit of the Mad Scientist community at large. 

Method:  REVERSE the POLARITY!  THROW the SWITCH, my twisted subhuman assistant!

Assistant: Doktor you're mad, we don't know what the effect might be!
We could create a temporal anomaly and shatter reality itself!  Don't make me do it!

DO IT, DO NOT STAND IN MY WAY!  (flogs assistant into unconsciousness)
THEY said I was MAD! THEY tried to stand in my way!  You are no  better than them, twisted assistant!  I shall do it myself, and let the world be damned!  The narrow-minded fools, now they will see!

(reverses polarity, throws switch, struck dead by a bolt of lightning)


Summary: I have found this approach to be extremely effective in mind-transference and temporal-rift openings, and offer it to the world.

Together we can work more efficiently and we can SHOW THEM