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Genesis 8

:1: Now, God didn't forget about Noah and his critters, and all them cattle on that boat: so God set the wind to blowin, and it blows all them waters back out there offa the land;
:2: And them fountains was in the ocean? Gone. God settled em down. And God stopped the rain too;
:3: After a spell, the land was dry agin. Took about a hunnert and fifty days.
:4: And on July seventeen, that boat come to rest on Ararat mountain.
:5: Come October first, you could see the tops of them mountains.
:6: Well, Noah he waited a respectable forty days, and he opened up one of them boat windows:
:7: And he sent out a bird to see if there was anyplace to set out there, but the bird come back on account of they was only water still.
:8: Then he sent out a dove, and the same thing happened;
:9: Noah reached out and grabbed that Dove when she come back.
:10: So he waits another week and sent out that dove agin;
:11: When that dove come back later in the evenin, had her a little olive branch, on account of them trees was pokin out the water by now.
:12: Then Noah waited another week and he sent that dove out, and she didn't come back, so ol Noah he knowed it was safe to climb out that boat.
:13: Pretty soon it was new years, 601 and things was finally all dried up. Seems like ol Noah didn't want to get caught in the mud: Noah took the top off that boat, and looked out there. It was all dried up, just the way he liked it.
:14: An the Earth was still dry Febuary 27.
:15: And God says to Noah, he says,
:16: "Get out that boat and take your kin."
:17: "And take them critters too so they kin start to makin young'uns".
:18: So Noah did what God told him:
:19: And all them critters, even the bugs and the snakes and such went out the boat.
:20: Noah was grateful he got saved, so he made a altar for some sacrificin; and he took all the critters that was good to eat, except that pig there, and he cooked em up, and put some up on that altar for God.
:21: God smelled that barbeque; and he says to hisself, "I ain't gonna curse the ground no more; on account of folks can't help theyselves when they's bad -- they was born that way!"; "And I ain't gonna just kill things without no good reason." It was kinda like a New Year's resolution.
:22: "Long as the Earth still here, gonna keep the growin season, an cold and hot, an summer and winter, and I'm gonna keep the night and day like they was."